Wednesday, July 25, 2007

The Weekend of the Happy Feet, Night One


If you made a running list of all the places your feet have been, all the trails your feet have hiked, all the shoes and socks and skates and flippers and slippers your feet have worn, why it would be impressive. (Read this about a guy's 1,200 mile trek through the Pacific Northwest Trail.)

The feet take a beating, my mom used to say, and you better care for them now. She’d tell me this when I was thirteen and she was paying extra money for quality shoes for my narrow, size AA feet. Those summers we went to a place we called Gracie’s, Crescent Beach Resort near Bemidji, and the poor resort owner, Gracie herself, would hobble between cabins, her bunions cobbling her up so badly. Mom would tell me at seventeen, just as I was to venture out into the world, take care of yourself. Don’t buy bad shoes. I know she really wanted to say, Don’t find bad men, don’t walk in bad places, but this is how mothers talk.

The men’s magazine, GQ, offers style advice to men. From their website:

Q: The bottoms of my feet feel like sandpaper. Are there any products to combat dry feet?
A: Absolutely. You could try any good body moisturizer, but two products have worked for me, both recommended by my wife with the perfect skin: L’Occitane Shea Butter, a rich emollient that comes in what looks like a big shoe-polish can, and Weleda Wild Rose body oil, which is a liquid. I’ve long had rotten feet, and now they are soft, smooth and low-mileage feeling. The rose oil also seems to help with dry, cracking toenails. I think moisturizing my feet helped me decisively conquer athlete’s foot, with the help of the incomparable and now over-the-counter medication Lamisil.

I’m sure metrosexuals do not have rotten feet. But take a look in the locker room next time you’re there. When I played basketball in high school, our point guard, Barb Hjelmsted, took a single razor to her heels every week, shaving off the crusty edges like we cut Gruyere for our bread. It was nasty. And then there are all those dancers I knew, the ones who progressed further than I ever did, whose battered feet are the stuff of legend.

But no matter. Your feet are your feet. 31% of Americans think feet are sexy, according to USA Today. (What a brave new world this is that I should find that stat so easily.) Give yours a little TLC and they’ll pay you back quickly. We all have home remedies, yes? My husband doesn’t use the incomparable Lamisil described above. Instead he keeps a fresh bottle of Witch Hazel in the bathroom closet for a daily foot dousing. My mom swears by a rub of Avon moisturizer and then donning white cotton socks for the night. That’s my plan. Mother knows best.

1 comment:

Sassmaster said...

When I get a pedicure, they use this little tool on my heel pads that looks and feels a little like a mini-kitchen grater. That is also nasty, and I can only put up with it for a short time without some involuntary kicking.