Selling Out

My son would earn extra credit in one of his classes if he brought in magazines no older than 2004 that his teacher planned to use for discussions on popular culture. I gave him the new O magazine that I had taken from the back of a Northwest Airlines seat. (Someone had left a personal copy there; did you know the airlines no longer stock magazines in that vertical bin right next to the Coach-class bathrooms? They even scraped off the labels, “Magazines.” Someone could store her Ziplock baggie there now, I guess.) My son found a few other mags, too: a Minneapolis-St. Paul magazine, a Vogue with Kristin Dunst on the cover, a USA Hockey, and a few Sports Illustrated. I wasn’t embarassed to shout down the stairs, “Hey, don’t take the one with Joe Mauer on the front cover!”

I found a drawer filled with some oldies—Martha Stewart pre-prison, Oprah pre-second weight loss. Flipping through them I could see the trends in advertising and graphic design and when companies started using .com addresses at the bottom of their ads. There were straightforward URLs at first: www.clorox.com, www.armstrong.com, and www.rapala.com.

In the newer magazines, whole Internet campaigns unfold on the glossy pages. There is no longer just kleenex.com but letitout.com, where readers can share their stories about crying and all those other moments when a tissue in hand is essential. You’ll find a Let It Out blog and a Let It Out Tour as well. No simple coke.com anymore but now mycokerewards.com, an incentive to bring all Coke-loving, fun-seeking pals together around themes like Nascar, March Madness, and American Idol. Trend-following companies like Iconoculture tell us that community building is in. (Pets as substitutes for kids and home meal replacements [HMRs] are in, too.)

The NFL wants to trademark “The Big Game.”There is Just Do It. (Nike) When it rains, it pours. (Morton Salt) Think outside the bun (Taco Bell--okay, we’ll probably never use that one.) Keep Walking. (Johnny Walker)

Our prose will now be filled with little TM marks, like those children’s books of a decade ago where you could press an icon that appeared every phrase or two: The donkey (cute icon of donkey) kicked his master (funny icon of peasant) all the way down the hill (small icon of lake). The donkey brays, the master yells, and the lake splashes—cool little multimedia pieces inside a traditional board book. Only in this new millennium of product-branding we’ll have a love story with all the expected plot twists and if you tap on the little icons next to the dialogue you’ll get the sexy voiceovers: “brought to you by Coke,” “courtesy of Kotex,” “copyrighted by Kodak.”

We’re still doing pretty traditional marketing at my publisher. No Internet communities or viral marketing—although we will give away some nifty snow globes with a book cover inside at the upcoming BEA. A perfect Minnesota knickknack.

Did you hear about Algonquin, the publisher for Brock Clarke's September novel, An Arsonist's Guide to Writers Homes in New England, who sent a fictitious letter to the media that warned of some famous houses torched or soon to be torched that brought out the Massachussets state police?

Publishers Weekly writes,

". . . the house mailed a one-page, seemingly handwritten letter to book review editors and members of the press last Friday. The missive, on paper decorated with roses and butterflies addresses a Mr. Pulsifer, and implores him to "burn down Edith Wharton's house." The note, signed "Sincerely, Beatrice Hutchins, Lenox, MA," makes no mention of a book, publisher or publicity effort, nor that Pulsifer and Hutchins are characters from a novel.

A PW staffer who received the letter contacted the Edith Wharton House, which is indeed located in Lenox, for comment. Susan Wissler, v-p of The Mount, the formal name for Wharton's estate, said Friday that while the letter seemed like a joke, it contained sufficient "menace" to warrant involving the police."

And how about the new videos some publishers are producing to promote books? Click on the video above for a new mystery that really could have used an editor, to say the least. Is this going to make me buy his book? Yeah, I don’t think so.

When I was at a writing conference a few weeks ago, I ran into a man who wanted to pitch me his manuscript, “Am I Famous?” Good God, I thought, let’s hope not. I’m getting a little sick of all the spin, aren’t you? Instead, let’s make things better (Philips). Let’s aim high (US Air Force), think different (Apple), find our own authentic inspiration (Airwick)—shall we?